Food, Glorious Food!

Questions about wedding food etiquette are asked every week by brides and grooms planning their wedding day. You will want your wedding day to be as exciting, memorable and, above all, as perfect as you wish. Undoubtedly, elements of wedding planning can be fun, some can be stressful, but they can also be downright tasty. Going through your options for food, drink and cake for your wedding should be the most enjoyable and delicious part of the planning process.

So much has changed regarding weddings, and some couples don’t split their guest list into day guests and evening guests anymore – they just have ‘"all day" guests’. Traditionally, people invited just close family and friends to their ceremony and wedding breakfast, then they would invite everyone else for the evening ‘do’. But nowadays, more and more couples decide to have all their friends and family for both parts of the day, meaning that since all their guests have eaten three courses at 5 pm, they will only need a snack in the evening.

Timings of wedding ceremonies have changed dramatically in the last 20 to 30 years. In the past, people married much earlier in the day meaning that it was ideal to have a sit-down meal at 1 pm, but this meant most people were hungry again by early evening. It is now more common for couples to plan their nuptials for the early afternoon, allowing a more relaxed start to the day for all! 

The days of bland and boring are long gone. Nowadays, the options for food are nearly endless. No matter your tastes, you can craft a menu that reflects YOU as a couple. 

Your choice of venue may very well dictate what food is on offer, so you must be clear about what the venue will allow or supply. From a traditional three-course sit-down wedding breakfast, an informal hot buffet, a delicious finger buffet or hired-in food vans, there are so many options to choose from. 

First things first: you’ll want to make enquiries as to what the venue allows you to do in terms of catering. Do they allow you to bring your own caterer? Many will not! If this is the case, you’ll be expected to use either the venue’s catering service or one of their preferred vendors. If you are to hire the caterer of your choice, you’ll want to book this vendor as early on as possible. Booking the caterer right after your venue helps ensure the two can work together seamlessly, giving your caterer time to develop menu options and place necessary orders to ensure your budget stays on track. Along with the reception venue cost and photography/videography, catering is often one of the most expensive items to budget for, so not one you want to sideline for too long.

Most external caterers will provide you and your fiancé with a ‘menu tasting’ at least a few months before the big day. This is an opportunity for you to try the proposed menu items and finalise a plan for exactly what you’ll serve at your wedding. Your caterer will be on hand to describe each menu item and ask for feedback to ensure the food is perfect for you on your day. This is the time to narrow down dishes if you’re still making decisions, or if you’ve chosen dishes already, this is the time to make any adjustments necessary. If you’re not loving something, let them know politely. If you have an idea for an alternative, don’t be afraid to propose it. Before your tasting, your caterer should ask a series of questions to get to know both of your tastes as well as the vibe of your wedding and guest list so they can come up with ideas for your custom menu.

There are four main styles of catering for wedding receptions including plated, buffet and staffed stations 

Plated: This is the most formal and probably most common of catering styles, a plated meal is ideal if you’re serving multiple courses. Serving a plated meal is also a great option, as the waiting staff will serve your seated guests simultaneously rather than having guests stand in line or be released by tables for a buffet, which takes much longer meaning that if you’re on a tight timeline that the meal will not drag on. It is a good idea to ensure that any dietary requirements such as allergies or vegetarians, are met if you choose to go for a seated service. You can navigate this issue by including a menu card in your invitation for guests to indicate their dietary needs.

Buffet: Having a buffet may be a more budget-friendly way to go, especially if you have a very large guest list. A buffet also allows guests a little more freedom over what goes on their plates, whereas, with a plated meal, their plates are prepared for them. 

Staffed Stations: Food stations are a fun option if you want to offer multiple styles of food or perhaps a more interactive experience! This type of catering can be served as platters on tables or as a couple of buffet-type tables around the room allowing guests to select their food.

Nowadays with most weddings taking place between 2 pm and 4 pm, the most common time for people sitting down for their wedding breakfast is around 4.30 – 5.30 pm.  Few people will want a buffet two hours later; therefore, serving evening food around 8 pm – 9 pm can add a whole new light to what evening menu is offered.

Now let’s just consider this question: Is evening food necessary at all? The answer in the majority of cases is certainly Yes! Do not forget you’ve been supplying guests with champagne, wine and beer all day so they will need something to soak it up! Despite feeding your guests a lavish three-course Wedding Breakfast (to which you think they would be full to the brim!) they will almost certainly need something later on to keep them going. Guests will expect to have some food during the evening.

Evening food is best as a snack-style arrangement. that can be eaten in one hand, whilst holding a drink in the other as they chat with other guests or dance the night away.

A hog roast is a classic evening party food which remains popular to this day. It is great food for a huge crowd of 100 – 140 people. It’s simple, tasty and hearty food.

Alternatively, ‘Food Trucks and Street Foods’ are making their way onto the wedding scene.  This is where a chef cooks the specialty food in front of the guests just like a market stall. With this, you get some entertainment and great fresh food! Offerings could include things like paella, chicken fajitas, or pizzas, as well as sweet options of doughnuts, crepes or churros.

Mezze or cheese buffet is a crowd-pleaser. The charcuterie boards have been taken to a whole new level with these massive grazing boards serving dozens upon dozens of delectable snacks including a large spread of antipasti, cheeses, rustic breads and olives for people to graze at. A focal point may be a wedding cheesecake’, stacked high with different traditional English cheeses, accompanied by crackers, bread, chutneys and crudités.. Your guests will love perusing the giant board and picking out their favourites for a custom snack plate! 

A sweetie cart…This can be a great addition to your evening party because people can dip into little bags of sweets all night and even take some home. The kids love them too!

In addition, don’t forget to ask your caterer to put your wedding cake out for people to take during the evening too. They should do this free of charge for you.

Finally, we would advise that you check your catering contract thoroughly, as a service charge or gratuity may already be built into your fees and will be required to be paid with the final bill due before your wedding. If it isn’t built in, it’s customary to tip the catering manager like you would at a restaurant: 15-20% of the food/drink fee.

Don’t forget to also tip the wait staff and bartenders, as well! Make sure you’re aware whether these staff members will be employed by your venue or by the catering/bartending company separately and review those contracts to see if any gratuities are included on your bill.